What I was doing was…

Feeling the lack of intention this morning and a sense of panic about needing to be productive, driving me to resist and get a bit worked up. I wound up meditating for 10 minutes then brainstormed for 5 minutes on something that is actually related to the show. What made the difference was accepting where I was and getting curious about it and I saw that there could be value in being curious about why I felt lost or stuck so I sat on the floor and meditated, closed my eyes, paid attention to the coming and going of breath through my nose and occasionally asked myself ‘what is this?’ and listened for what came back. I feel much more chilled out and glad of reconnecting to the show which has a newness and playfulness about it which my present work doesn’t (because I’m in the marathon middle of actually doing it). Would like to spend some more time on the show again soon, I feel like I’m neglecting it, but don’t know how I can make time -I know that working through other stuff will make space eventually and I’m just in a bit of a slog place right now.